My Catholic life began at the font of baptism at St. Luke’s Catholic Church in Ogallala. Our Lord received unto himself a little one whom he would love thoroughly and promise his faithfulness, grace and mercy. I grew up in a Catholic home, attended Mass, prayed the rosary and heard countless stories of our brothers and sisters in the Communion of Saints.
As a young boy, I remember struggling to understand what the Church was telling us through the lives of the saints. The more I heard, the more I felt this tremendous chasm between them and me. As if God had snapped his fingers and granted them heroic virtue and faith-inspiring superpowers, while he forgot about me. I remember feeling the alienation that comes from the struggle with sinfulness and all of my boyish attempts to hide from God behind the fig leaf. My perception of God was sorely misshapen, and it left such a wound on my heart that would follow me into maturity.
In 2007, I married my high school sweetheart, Meghan, after completing mortuary school in Kansas City. We began our married lives in Cozad, where I worked as a funeral director with my relatives. I loved Jesus with my mind, but that love didn’t always reach down to my heart and take its form in my actions. Marriage was tough, and I placed my vocation as a funeral director above my sacramental vocation as a husband. God is still teaching me the right balance.Meghan and I recommitted to seriously living our Catholic Faith. We resigned ourselves to go to confession and quit trying to hide from the omniscient God, seeking his mercy and goodness instead. Together, we entered a new season of Faith that we are still traversing. We aspired to radically open ourselves to God’s will, so, as a faithful and willing boy with some loaves and fishes taught us, and reminded by our offertory, we brought to God what we had and invited him to take over. In his high priestly way, the Lord took our offering, blessed it and changed it into something new and abundant … literally! Meghan and I have experienced such profound blessings, including four more children who have multiplied and deepened our faith: Aaron, Andrew, Alexandra and Austin. I’m so proud and happy to be their earthly father, a gift that far surpasses any material thing I could ask for. Also, we now have the biggest van I could have ever asked for; I half-jokingly call it the C.A.V. (Catholic Assault Vehicle).
God also actively uses our children to reform our perception of his divine love. As their father, I see my children wearing around my own defects and foibles at times, but I’m able to see them through a lens of profound and unconditional love. As a boy, I always pictured God looking at me with disappointment. He has taught me otherwise, as my love for my children couldn’t approach the love of our Father in heaven. Through my children, the Father teaches me of his profound love; through Meghan, Jesus teaches me the nature of his love for the Church; and through my love of our Lord in the sacraments, the Holy Spirit sweeps me up into an encounter with divine love that calms the restlessness of my heart. So it is; the Lord gives mysteriously and not as the world gives.
To my married brothers and sisters in Christ, I pray that this meets you with encouragement. Be courageous and trusting in surrendering what you have to God and trusting him with your life and the size of your family. God has allowed us to be co-authors of the miraculous: new life. He patiently showed me that his plan was far better than anything I would have chosen for myself. I would invite you to consider this thought experiment: If every practicing Catholic married couple were generous in their openness to God’s plan for their family and subsequently raised their children in accordance with the Faith, how long would it be before our Lord would reclaim the heart of our culture and society? Friends, don’t be afraid to lay down the life that the culture “catechizes” us to live. In losing that life, you will find the one that God wants to give you.May you be richly blessed,
JMJ
The Tickle Family
Jason, Meghan Tickle
+Samantha Jane, Elizabeth Rose, Aaron Alexander, Andrew Fulton, Alexandra Gemma Ann and Austin John